Tuesday, June 26, 2012

6/25/12 RAW

Daniel Bryan vs. CM Punk vs. Kane (Elimination): **1/2

Big Show vs. Brodus Clay: 1/2*

Santino Marella vs. Jack Swagger (U.S. Title): *

Sycho Sid vs. Heath Slater: N/A (squash)

Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio (Contract on a Pole): *3/4

Divas Summertime Beach Battle Royal: DUD

John Cena vs. Chris Jericho: *1/2

AJ appears to be talking to Daniel Bryan, Kane, and Punk, but she's practicing talking into a mirror about probably dumping all three of them. Cole thinks she's talking to herself. Yeah, she's crazy. Nice intro to the show. Meanwhile, Cena has a major announcement for later in the show.

Vickie Guerrero is the interim GM this week for RAW and Smackdown. Yes, you are excused. Nice heel heat.

Triple threat elimination match to start. And DB's in it! Yes yes yes! Crowd agrees. Twitter poll on who AJ should be with. I'd vote #AJALL. Punk and DB double-team Kane. Nice Punk curb stomp to DB after teasing a sharpshooter. Kane ready to chokeslam Punk but AJ comes out to skip around the ring. No Kane mask tonight. Still, it allows Punk to hit the GTS on Kane. Kane gone. DB with that KO Tajiri-like kick to Punk for three. YES!

Alberto with roses for Vickie. Ricardo apparently forgot the vase. Meanwhile, ADR and Dolph are in a World Title Contract on a Pole match to determine who faces Sheamus for the World Title on Smackdown. Ricardo's back with the vase, and Dolph sends that into next week.

Two huge guys in Show and Brodus battle. Brodus selling that injured left knee. Show nearly slips on the ropes, but delivers that Vader Bomb to the knee. Naomi and Cameron are concerned, as they should be. Brodus attempts a slam, Show falls on him, and Show gets the pin?! Um, OK. Odd finish, but whatever. Good job attacking and selling the knee. Brodus gets helped to the back, and Show KOs him with the WMD. Does this mean Brodus goes off TV and loses the dancers? That guy seriously needs to be a heel. The damn Funkasaurus gimmick was odd from the start, and it's not getting him anywhere right now. So what, feud with Show and ultimately lose? Show's being built as this dominant giant with the ironclad contract. Brodus wouldn't be going over here, not now.

Cena gets a video package for all those Make a Wish grants he's done (over 300). Bob Barker's guest host deal from RAW also shown -- which was probably one of the most enjoyable guest host RAW episodes ever.

Lesnar answers HHH's challenge next week. Of course Lesnar will eventually say yes. But with all the drama I read about concerning Lesnar, it's doubtful he wins. Maybe he's been training and looks even more jacked by the time SummerSlam comes around.

Kane has feelings he never thought were possible. Let's just ignore all those human transformations he's had over the years. Best line was Kane admitting that, even to him, AJ's mentally unstable. Basically Kane dumping AJ. AJ with a mixture of crying and laughing. What, no random Kaitlyn to attack?

Swagger doesn't even get a TV entrance anymore. Meanwhile, he jobs to Santino in a U.S. Title match in less than three minutes. Yeah, Santino finally defends the gold. Poor Swagger. He's got good moves and athleticism, but just doesn't have that "it" factor right now. #jobbingjack

Cena and Ryder throw a "People Power" T-shirt in the trash. Cena comes out to start hour #2. Some Star Wars stuff intermixed with WWE superstars. Have to admit, that was great. Before the historic announcement, here comes JERICHO to save us all. He grew his hair out just a little more, still short, though. Thank you. No mention of the Brazilian flag incident, just the European tour he went on with Fozzy.

Jericho with his vintage "just cut to the chase" statement for Cena. Cena says he's in the MITB ladder match to prevent Show from winning. Suitcase? Thought it was a briefcase. Fudgin'? Yeah, way to cater to the PG crowd. Jericho then enters himself in the MITB ladder match. Vickie comes out to say there are TWO MITB ladder matches at the PPV. Jericho pokes fun at himself with the "suspension" line.

MITB ladder match now only for former WWE and World champs. Vickie announces Kane, Big Show, Jericho, and Cena. Vickie books Jericho and Cena tonight, and I like it.

Time for another former RAW superstar to show his face to commemorate RAW's 1000th show. Two weeks ago, it's Vader. Last week, it was Cyndi Lauper, Wendi Richter, and Roddy Piper. Before Lilian announces the legend (apparently a former 2-time WWE champion?), Heath Slater gets to job again! Great job with the "rule the world" line to lead into the former star's entrance....

...AND HOLY CRAP IT'S SID! WOOHOO! Marked out there. I watched the WCW Sin PPV over 10 years ago where he had that horrific broken leg. Frankly, I don't want to watch that again. Slater at least remembered to attack that same leg Sid broke many moons ago. Doesn't matter, though. Powerbomb ended it quickly. As basic a match as you'd expect. Sid has clearly aged, so I doubt he's doing many more of these.

Time for the Contract on a Pole match to see who faces Sheamus on Smackdown. Nice show of agility and athleticism here. Nice second-rope Samoan drop from ADR. Interesting stuff with Ziggler pulling the clipboard down, and it's basically a mad scramble for "control" of that clipboard. Even Ricardo gets nuked trying to get to it. They fall out the other side of the ring, Sheamus comes out, and basically says he'll take both of them on for the title. Triple threat. So what the hell was the point of this match?! Grr.

Foley's "This is Your Life" segment from eons ago plays. Classic.

Divas have a summertime beach battle royal. They are all in bikinis. And Vickie is a part of it. I think many of our viewers went blind. I think Alicia Fox actually rolled out of the ring to eliminate herself. AJ, Layla, and Vickie were the last three. AJ wins. YESYESYES. Oh, and Punk guessed King Kong Bundy before in his segment with AJ. Brilliant!

Cena and Jericho in a short main event. Cena's been in the company 10 years (yes, really). Signature moves hit, with some counters. Big Show then comes out. Cena in the Walls of Jericho. Show legdrops Cena, so I guess Cena wins by DQ. Jericho hightails it. Show chokeslams Cena. Hey, Cole remembers the Colossal Clutch! Cena choked out to end the show.

Mostly forgettable second half of the show. Nice to see Big Show booked strong.

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