Saturday, June 16, 2012

6/15/12 Smackdown

Daniel Bryan & Dolph Ziggler vs. CM Punk & Sheamus: **1/2

Brodus Clay vs. Heath Slater: N/A (squash)

Beth Phoenix vs. Alicia Fox: N/A (squash)

Christian vs. Jack Swagger: *1/2

Ryback vs. Ari Cohen & Mike Testa: N/A (squash)

Damien Sandow vs. Tyson Kidd: N/A (squash)

AJ starts the show. Huh?!?! A diva starts the show, and with a promo, no less. I hate Kane. I envy that guy like no other. That was a serious liplock AJ had on him. Before AJ can explain anything, Vickie interrupts. Booooo. Knew it was too good to be true. But hey, if Ziggler gets to talk and wrestle, I'm all for it. AJ calls Vickie a grandma. Punk comes out and cuts a great promo as always.YESYESYES, it's Daniel Bryan coming out, then Sheamus. We're gonna have the tag match now! AJ wants to kick Vickie's ass but Punk cuts AJ off. Aw, I wanted to see carnage.

Very good opening tag match. Ziggler got the much-needed win, even if it was by heel tactics. Sheamus is pissed and chases Ziggler through the crowd. AJ gets her hands on Vickie but the cougar gets away. Kane comes out and takes AJ away. Punk to the rescue? Kane nukes both DB and Punk in the ring. AJ looks on from the stage. I want to say she got turned on by that in her psychopathic mindset. Psychogasm? Sure, that's a good word.

Brodus in the ring on the mic. He wants competition. Instead, he gets Heath Slater, the guy who lost to Vader on Monday. Yeah, I'm perplexed as well. Slater's done in 23 seconds. Time to dance. Not so fast. Otunga takes Brodus' left knee out. I forgot they had a pre-show match at No Way Out. OK, now I remember. Meanwhile, Naomi and Cameron just stand around doing nothing. At least call for help or do something, please.

Layla on commentary while Beth fights Alicia. Beth nukes Alicia in under a minute. Vintage statement making!

Hornswoggle's favorite episode was when the muppets hosted RAW.

Laurinaitis "apologizes" to Vince and tells him to stay away from Big Show. Big Show with a good heel promo. Cole says Cena will be on Smackdown later tonight.

Christian faces Swagger in a routine match. Frog splash gets Christian another win and good momentum.

Ryback nukes two more smallish guys in about two minutes. Good grief. Too repetitive. At least I get to see Ryback and chant "GOLD-BERG!" all the time. I saw a "RY-BERG" sign! Awesome.

Video of Sandow's attack on Tyson Kidd last week, so Sandow and Kidd actually fight for real this week. Then again, it's more like a squash with a few cool spots.

Cena kicks in Laurinaitis' door, but no one there. How funny that they show one of those "Be a Star" anti-bullying videos right after. Facepalm. Cena calls Show out, but gets Laurinaitis instead. Big Show sent home to "protect Cena" and to ensure the match happens at No Way Out. If Cena loses at No Way Out, Laurinaitis fires Cena. Cena decks Laurinaitis with the mic. Doesn't matter, because the match must happen anyway.

Oh, I finally realized Cena's back to wearing those "jorts" again. Ugh.

Too many squashes for my liking on this episode. Not that great a show, aside from the opening match and post-match entertainment.

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